Wednesday, November 17, 2004

Ramblings v1.0

When I was younger, I never really thought much about who I was, what people thought about me, and what facades I should put on. And yes, I believe everyone should have a facade of some kind, an external buffer, so people don't really get to know you very well unless they deserve to. I say all this without any intention of giving myself too much importance. Its just that at some point of time, you need to filter the what-you-get to precipitate the what-you-want, at least to a small extent. Back to what I was saying. A while ago, I was a total cynic; the perfect definition of it. I would put down people putting things down, and then zoom out some more, to put down that level of being as well. And zoom out some more. But then I realised that somewhere or the other, the levels must end. So I turned to being far more positive about things. And its working out nicely, just as well, in fact, as when I was cut off from all feeling. But I'm glad that I've been on both sides of the wall. Because I now how to keep my head above the water, by not getting too deep into things, taking life only as seriously as I see fit, and not as someone else does. But I do get involved sometimes, and much as it might get a little tedious, its important to step in and test the water. Its not all bad, and you learn a lot.

I'm going to make an honest attempt at keeping this blog alive. It shouldn't be too shabby. I'm 17, live in Bangalore, India, and study computer science. I read a bit, and am fascinated by Douglas Adams, as well as Salman Rushdie and Jhumpa Lahiri. I'm very into music, and listen to quite a bit, from Indian classical to Coldplay to Evergrey (I'll have a Now Playing thing at the beginning of each succesive blog). I play guitar myself, and find it to be one of my best method of expression. With a guitar and a whole lot of teen brashness, you can be loud, incoherent and just plain stupid. But when the angles are just right, you can be sombre, insightful and sensitive. And I oscillate between both states, and several in between.

I'm also into art; not fine art as such, but more of digital and urban art. I'm a member of Deviantart [www.deviantart.com], which is a humongous community of artists worldwide. Its worth a visit. I dabble a bit in graphic design myself, but don't claim to be very good at it.

Other than this, I'm not very extraordinary. I'm writing this blog mainly for myself, because its something to do, and also because I talk to myself a lot and don't fancy wasting words on just myself. I don't intend to achieve much with this, just attempt to salvage some sanity and pour it out here.